Long delays and goings ons

I have always been one that was overly cautious, but in very specific ways. I mean, I'm not one to go skydiving, but that's not the type of cautions I'm talking about. I mean that when things look uncertain or a positive outcome isn't a guarantee, it takes me a while to jump out and say "yes I will do that." It's that I want to be the Best at what I'm doing or know that at the end I will have accomplished something of note.

When I am asked to do something by someone else, my answer is almost always yes. There is safety in this. In this scenario, I am agreeing to attach myself and my skills to someone else's project. The risk is really theirs. I will, of course, give it my all, but if it fails, I can always fall back on the idea that it's "not my fault."

Such was true when agreeing to plan a symposium for USITT (the United States Institute for Theatre Technology). I was contacted out of the blue in August of last year. They caught me when I was feeling both ambitious and bored. I have been wanting to become more involved in the organization for some time now, so this seemed like a golden opportunity. In many ways it has been. I asked a collegue to help (and you got to believe I'm glad I did!) and we put together one heck of a symposium! We are now only 3 weeks away. If you're interested in finding out about it, click here.

The scary things are when I have to put out my own neck. I have been interested in starting my own business for a long time. The idea has evolved over time, but in the last 2 years it has been one that exists as a website. This means I could work on it in my own time and it won't conflict with any "real" job that I have. But I have been horribly stalled. Why?

Last month, when I went to an Artist Group hosted by a dear friend Liz Ostler (check out her business Life's Ecos) I won something. Now, I've never been anyone who wins things since I was a little girl. I keep saying that I used up all my luck at the Easter Egg Scramble I went to when I was about 8 years old. The idea was to collect plastic eggs and inside was a slip of paper that would give you your prize. While all the other kids ran to the center, fighting over eggs, I stayed on the edges and had no competition, managing to collect more eggs than anyone else. What's more, I scored all stuffed animals! Another little girl glared at me and her one truck. Whatever, little girl, next time use your brain.

Anyway, not the point.

The point is that I went that day because Liz personally asked me and said there would be a guest. Nikol Peterman would be talking about the Wealthy Artist. As a bonus, she took all our names and email addresses and one of us would win a free life coaching session. Have you ever had the feeling that you were the one that was going to win? It was so odd, because I had that feeling as I was writing my name, and then I could almost see my slip of paper being pulled from the hat. And it was ME! I won!

We had our session a few weeks ago. It was incredibly helpful. She gave me some videos to watch ahead of time. Then we talked. I managed to put my website project into focus. I knew all the information was there, but she really helped make it into something useful.

If you're looking for some help focusing on your art, either of these ladies will be incredibly helpful!

In any event, I have a mission statement now. I have promised 10 hours per week working on the website, though that hasn't happened yet. I have some personal hurdles to get over with my fears. But having her check in on me has helped to put that fire under by butt. It's still scary, but I have a better vision of what the business can - and will - be.


Popular Posts